DDDDD IIIII SSSS ''' ''' ''' DDDDD A TTTTT D D I S S ''' ''' n ''' D D A A T D D I S ' ' nnnnnn ' D D A A T D D I SSSS ' ' n n ' D D A A T D D I S n n D D AAAAAAA T D D I S S n n D D A A T DDDDD IIIII SSSS n n DDDDD A A T "All Disney news fitted to print" -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Volume 1 Number 3 June 93 Edition --------------------------------------------------------------------------
In this issue...
Yet another former Disney animator, Tim Burton is readying his latest work for release by the studio that the Mouse built. Called The Nightmare Before Christmas, it consists of stop-motion clay animation. Former U.S. Vice President Dan Quayle has reportedly turned down a starring role (one of the few humans that could pass as a clay model). Mr. Burton, who you may recall from his minor hits "Batman," Batman Returns, Edward Scissorhands, and, of course the super colossal mega-hit "Frankenweenie," is sure to impart his trademark happy-go-lucky, freewheeling, and upbeat tempo to this work.
In the wake of the phenomenal success of the Disney Stores, the company will soon embark on a new financial venture called The Disney Grocery. This store will specialize in grocery items with a Disney theme. A new line of Disney Channel T.V. Dinners will be available exclusively to this outlet (obviously, you must bring your own cable). Magic Kingdom Club cardmembers will get their customary 10% discount on the items in the stores (which will be approximately 50% above comparable cost available elsewhere). In a not-so-surprising move, they have announced that MKC members that are Disney Stockholders will get a 10% markup on their purchases instead.
After receiving a
body check
from an anonymous hockey player,
the publisher of DIS' 'n' DAT is not going to make any comments in
this issue about a certain
Southern California NHL Expansion Team.
Simply let us know exactly what is
good
and what is
bad
at Disney.
A few entries are shown below to indicate the format being used
[thanks to ins448c@aurora.cc.monash.edu.au (Quetzal) for his early input].
As you can see, the list is entirely subjective.
Any and all entries made (in good taste, of course, but DIS' 'n' DAT has
never been accused of having any taste) will be printed in an upcoming
issue.
Send your entries to the publisher at "lar3ry@world.std.com."
The Benjamin Mint is proud to offer this endearing portrait of the
mystical personality of Mr. Disney, created by the award winning
minimalist artist Victor Memsley, whose works are sought after by
collectors and law officers everywhere.
Entitled "The Final Resting Place," this piece captures a piece of
Walt's history in its depiction of a solid block of ice.
Each work is hand-numbered and bordered in genuine plastic.
Each bears the artist's signature mark that has been connected with
the artist in over five states on the bottom.
Priced at $1499.95, this Limited Edition will be closed forever after
just fifteen firing days, or when a certain court injunction is filed.
Available EXCLUSIVELY from the Benjamin Mint, 1515 Benjamin Place,
Benjamin Heights, DC.
SEND NO MONEY NOW... just let us know your credit card number (and
account limit), and we will send you your just deserts when it becomes
available.
LIMIT ONE WORK PER CREDIT CARD PLEASE.
Top 10 Movie Titles Rejected by Touchstone
And the number one Movie Title rejected by Touchstone in the last
twelve months is...
Good and Bad at Disney
In view of the enormous response to our contest, we at DIS' 'n' DAT are going
to try yet another attempt at audience participation.
Advertisement
An artist...
A genius...
The most influential person of the twentieth century...
All these terms have been used to describe one profound individual:
Walter Elias Disney.
Yes, the father of Mickey Mouse... of Disneyland... of "Saludos
Amigos" can be yours for a limited time only.